Well, before about ten minutes ago, my answer to this question would have been different. But then I checked my grades and saw that I got a 36/100 on the Organic Chemistry test I took last night. Now I'm afraid of not graduating. Seriously. I don't know what I would do. My parents have been planning all this party stuff for graduation. They have gotten hotel rooms for graduation weekend. THEY BOUGHT ME A CAR AS A GIFT. I cannot mess this up. I actually studied for that test. It was ridiculously hard. I really hope the average is insanely low and he is forced to curve it more than he normally would. I am so glad I got an 80 on my first test. I feel like that is the only thing saving me right now. I'm scared...
Before tonight, I think I would have answered this question with something along the lines of being afraid of the future. I am not sure what I want to do with my life, and that scares me, a lot. I will only be 23 when I graduate, but I don't want to be a 30 year old waitress. I want to do something substantial with my life, but I just don't know what, and that scares me.
Another thing that scares me is not having any money... My parents' stipulation for buying me that car was that they won't help me out financially anymore. And that is scary. Especially considering my new job sucks and I don't make any money. I am freaking out because I don't know how I'm going pay rent or any of my bills in the near future. It's a very scary situation.
A third thing that scares me is losing Sam. He means the world to me, and I would be so sad without him. When he got sick back in February, it tore me apart, because it made me think about what would happen if he weren't around. I never thought I could be so attached to an animal, but I definitely am.
Something else that scares me, which isn't nearly as important as the others, is that something or someone is going to damage my new car. I have been parking it at the far ends of parking lots, taking up two spaces, cramming it into my tiny garage... All so nothing happens to it. Which is silly, of course, because I know something is EVENTUALLY going to happen to it... But for now, I want it to stay as new as possible for as long as possible.
I'm really afraid of a lot of things. I could make this list go on forever. But I will leave it at those few things.
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