Update city

So much has changed in my life since my last post. I don't even know where to start... I guess I'll start with my health.

I finally feel like a normal human being again. I still take my heart medicine and the Lexapro, but I hardly even notice that I'm "sick" anymore. Sometimes my heart acts weird, but I usually just brush it off (like all the ER doctors always do...), and it usually goes away pretty quickly. Most importantly, I feel like I can have a social life again. I can drink alcohol without dying, and my anxiety is much more under control in social settings. I feel like this horrible chapter of my life is finally ending and I can be a normal person again.

My job is still great, and I wouldn't change anything about it. Back in November, my boss took a different position, and someone new took over our team. He is a fantastic Team Manager, and I feel very lucky to have him as a boss.

My relationship with David has been going really well, but we're going through a really big change soon. He took a position with a company in Kansas City, and he will be moving out there in June for that. After much discussion, I decided it was best for me to stay here in my current role with my company. So in the next couple of months he'll be moving out there, and a girl I used to work with at Chili's (and who will be starting at my company next month) will be moving in here. I wasn't sure at first how that would work, but I'm getting more and more excited about having a roommate again. (Ask me again in six months how I feel about it. We'll see.) I am nervous that this transition is going to be difficult for David and me, but I'm hoping we can work through it. And if not, then it probably wasn't meant to be anyway, which is sad to think about, but true...

I have been working out a lot lately (which could be part of the reason why I'm feeling better overall), but I don't really feel like it's doing anything. Okay, that's not true. My stamina while working out is significantly better, but my clothes basically still fit the same and I don't think I look any differently. It's frustrating as hell, and I can see that this is why people give up. But I'm going to Vegas with my mom at the end of May, and I'm bound and determined to look better in a swimming suit by then. It probably doesn't help that I ate both pasta AND cereal for dinner tonight... but I can't be perfect.

I've become pretty good friends with a girl at work, and it's making me feel less lonely. I spent this past weekend helping her and her partner de-wallpaper their bathroom, and it's nice to feel like I have an actual friend here in town. Plus they have a new baby, so that keeps me entertained. And they live like 45 seconds from my house, which is always nice. She has gone through tons of trauma in her life, and I feel like we both benefit from our friendship.

Speaking of trauma... one of my very close friends was killed by a drunk driver in December. I was in Houston visiting another friend at the time, and I was devastated that I couldn't go see her in the hospital before she actually passed away. I was, and still am, very heartbroken about the whole thing, mostly because she was one of the greatest people I've ever met. She was so smart, thoughtful, and funny - it's still really hard to believe that she is gone. Her best friend works with me now, and I find myself thinking a lot about how she must feel. If I'm as devastated as I am about it, I can only imagine how she feels. It's a really unfortunate situation that was completely avoidable, but there is nothing we can do about it now. I still think about her every single day, and I'm not sure when that will go away...

Anyway, now that I'm sufficiently depressed, I'm going to go back to watching the baseball game.